I must be getting old, because I can’t figure out what this is supposed to mean. It’s not even sexy.
The Different Types of Sorority Girls
September 26th, 2011 -
This has been sitting in my Drafts folder for exactly a year now, showing how much I suck. Since I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth, and my Mom could only afford to feed me with a Spork, not to mention my cleft lip (caused by the Spork,) I was never offered the opportunity to go to college. So this specific slice of life has always remained a mystery to me, and everything I know about it is from the internet. Did you know that most of the pharmaceutical representatives that convince your doctor to put you on expensive medications were cheerleaders and in sororities? See, the Internet taught me that. Now I just need to get me a doctor costume and rent an office, and imma get me some sorority girl lovin’. brb lmao omg!
Prime Suspect
September 26th, 2011 -
I watched Prime Suspect the other night, for a couple of reasons:
- Helen Mirren was in the original, and I’d drop everything, fly to Britain, and bang her today if she asked.
- Maria Bello is kind of hot and willing to have sex with guys on a flight of stairs (or if they play Aragorn, which I am working on.)
- My wife turned it on and she gets pissy when I try and watch something she didn’t pick.
It was pretty good, really. I was hoping someone would have a screencap of Maria Bello at the restaurant wearing that sexy white dress while sporting two black eyes. ‘Cause black eyes are sexy on a woman. I guess you’ll have to settle for a picture of her twat after the jump.
Yes We Are, Lisa
September 20th, 2011 -
Bonus porn quote of the day: Aren’t you glad I know what teabagging means? – Lisa Sparxxx in Real MILF Gangbangs.
Christina Hendricks Really, Really Wants To Be Wonder Woman
September 20th, 2011 -
The whole article is about how Christina used to wear Wonder Woman Underoos, and how much she wants to play Wonder Woman, which I think is the greatest idea evar. Even though I am a misogynist that sexual-izes her along with all woman, I respect her acting acumen, her personality, and her values.
Now excuse me while I try and dive face first into her cleavage through my monitor and dream about ripping those underoos off of her.
Christina Hendricks Really, Really Wants To Be Wonder Woman | The Frisky.
WTF is This?
September 19th, 2011 -
All I could think of while watching this is Somebody must have seen a bad Chinese imitation of a Gwen Stefani video and thought “British people will eat this shit up!” And I guess it worked.
Stick to being a cocktease, babe. This singing thing just isn’t for you. Trust me, I remember Pia Zadora. I’ve been around.
Site Updates
September 19th, 2011 -
Mandatory Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com
So I haven’t been updating the site all that often, mostly because I forgot my password and was too damn lazy to recover it. The sad part is my hit s didn’t seem to drop at all. How do I get this site more visible? I think this Internet things is the biggest ponzi scheme since Social Security.
Of course, you didn’t read any of that, because you are too busy slouching down and beating off to Christina Hendrick’s giant tits. Now go hit some of my other pages, you literal wanker. You could die from chafing all the skin off your dick before you plowed through all the pictures I have posted. Tell your friends. Hook the computer up to your crappy Vizio television you bought at Wal-mart and have another one of your home-erotic jerk parties. They are all the rage in Belfast.
Best Pregnancy OF ALL TIME!
September 1st, 2011 -
You have to give props to those Taiwanese, boy. They know how to take the news and push it to the next level. I didn’t even know she was pregnant, and now am fully informed upon the subject. If I had know that baby shit could turn into dollars, I would have kept my offspring’s production and I would be stinking rich, too. Oh wait, I guess Tom Cruise’s kid’s crap is made of gold. Damn Scientologists.
Porn Star Zombies
May 12th, 2011 -
Maybe with the right presentation, this zombie awareness thing could get me laid.
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